Saturday, July 12, 2008

If I could walk on water

I hate my life.
My phone rang this morning, I'm in the living room, it's in the bedroom, but I knew the only person that would be calling me would be my mother, and she'd be pissed cause I ignored the 2 calls from my father yesterday. I didn't see the point of going in to see what the message was about, so I'm expecting my mom to come pounding up the stairs and yell at me. When I did go to check my message, she was saying how she had a window for me to get started work on, and that she wanted to deal with my light bulbs in the kitchen (they're those big long flourescents and they went out a couple weeks ago, my mom thinks its the light bulbs, Kevin says its the ballasts, I'm more apt to believe Kevin, I'd love for my mom to buy new light bulbs and then have them not work), I don't know why she's so bothered by the fact they don't work, she's not living up here, she doesn't use them, hell I don't even use them.
I hate not having money. I spent all the money my parents gave me for my birthday on bills and I'm pretty much back where I was before I deposited it, and I have more bills coming up on the 15th. I'm guessing I'll be walking down to Target today and applying there. I just wish every job that I applied for hired me. I may not really want the jobs, but I don't show that when I go in to the interviews. I hate this, I know it's part of the job process, but this is the first time (ok 2nd) that I've applied for jobs, gone through the interview process and not been guaranteed the job. Honestly I have no idea how I've lasted this long without a constant income.
I wish I could just leave and never come back here. If I didn't have Kevin, I'd seriously look into leaving here. I know I've loved living here, and it works great for me, but pair the tension of my parents and not having a job, it's really getting to me.

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